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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27446095">hey goat</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowshoes/pseuds/rainbowshoes'>rainbowshoes</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>witcher tumblr prompts [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Fluff, Goats, M/M, No Plot/Plotless, Tumblr Prompt</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-07 02:48:54</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>836</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27446095</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowshoes/pseuds/rainbowshoes</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>i asked for prompts on tumblr and this is the answer to this one:<br/>"JASKIER NEEDS TO MEET LIL BLEATER"</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Eskel/Jaskier | Dandelion</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>witcher tumblr prompts [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2004985</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>143</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>hey goat</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>cross posted from <a href="https://shyglittercreature.tumblr.com/">my tumblr</a></p>
<p>title from <a href="https://youtu.be/Enn3SmHEwe8">this vine</a></p>
<p>I dont know SHIT about goats, yall</p>
<p><a href="https://youtu.be/bisPiH2s9Ng">here's a video</a> i watched to give me an idea of what goats even fucking were like, realistically, outside of pictures and shit. This is an animal i have never actually encountered (except maybe at a petting zoo when i was a kid?) and have zero experience with, so pls forgive my ignorance (chickens, on the other hand, are DICKS, and i know that from first-hand experience)</p>
<p>Also lil bleater is a girl bc MILK for cheese and shit </p>
<p>Side note: this vibes with the other lil thing i posted but i dont think its necessary to read the other one to understand this one</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>The very first thing they'd done as soon as they'd arrived at Kaer Morhen was take Scorpion to the stables. Jaskier had taken all the bags off to the side so they were at least out of the way for the time being and Eskel had begun to do away with Scorpion's tack so he could brush him and everything else. Jaskier left Eskel to it, far too nosey for his own good and far too eager to get more of a look at the fabled witcher keep. It didn't really matter that he would be there literally all winter - he wanted to see it all right away. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He was surprised at how… normal it looked. That sounded awful, even in his own head. Sure, there were parts he could see that had clearly suffered from when the keep had been stormed and the witchers and mages killed, and from the weather as well, but… other than that, it was just a regular castle, really. There were chickens and a few goats wandering more or less freely, which wasn't all that odd in Jaskier's experience. The biggest difference was that it was empty. There were no people anywhere. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Jaskier made his way over to a covered well. Mostly he wanted to use it as a convenient place to sit as he waited for Eskel. It was already late afternoon, which meant they couldn't do much today - any exploration would have to wait until tomorrow. Jaskier was tired anyway, so that was fine, but he still wanted to see what was closeby in what time he had left. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>And then something slammed into his thigh </span>
  <em>
    <span>very fucking hard</span>
  </em>
  <span>. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"What the </span>
  <em>
    <span>fuck</span>
  </em>
  <span>!" Jaskier yelped, stumbling and almost falling. He managed to keep his feet - barely - and spin to look down at whatever had just attacked him. The little black and white goat bleated at him and trotted forward again, head lowered a bit. Jaskier held out his hand to fend off another attack. "Oh no you don't. No. Bad - goat?" He didn't think he'd ever seen one quite so small before, and it didn't really look like a kid. But the goat definitely didn't stop. "Hey!" He tried to take a step back again, but he backed right up against the well and sat hard on the wooden cover. The goat nudged its head insistently against Jaskier's hand, very much like a too-friendly cat, actually. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Well, this is better than attacking me," Jaskier told the goat. "That was very rude, you know. I expect an apology." The goat lifted its hooves and put them on Jaskier's chest, instead, and bleated once more. Jaskier snickered, even as he turned his head away and gently pushed the goat back down. He did continue to offer the goat all the scratches it so insistently demanded, however. "Very well, I accept your apology. But you stink, a bit." He laughed as the goat headbutted his thigh again, though it was a gentle one this time. "You are a demanding little thing, aren't you?" He used both hands to pet the goat, and it finally seemed satisfied by that arrangement. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"Jaskier?" </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>He looked up and grinned as Eskel made his way over from the stables. Eskel had a small smile on his face. "I've been attacked! Slain by this foul beast!" The goat jumped on him again, and Jaskier grunted softly at the impact before pushing the little goat back down to the ground once more. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Eskel laughed, and Jaskier beamed at the sound. He didn't get to hear it all that often, which was a shame - Eskel's laugh was a delight to hear. Jaskier wished he could bottle it and keep it with him always. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"That's Lil' Bleater," Eskel said, still smiling. He came over and knelt beside the goat and stole all of its affections for himself. "She's a troublemaker." </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I can tell," Jaskier said with his own smile as he leaned back on his hands to watch them. The goat was even more demanding of affection from Eskel than she had been from Jaskier. "She really likes you."</span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>"I bottle fed her," Eskel admitted. "Got her in a village in Lyria. Some traders had brought these little dwarf goats from the Korath Desert, and they didn't have much money to pay for me to take care of a cockatrice that had been killing some of their herd. So they gave me the goat, too. Was a bit of a nightmare, traveling with her, but I got her here. Now she just gets into everything and makes a menace of herself." He said it with so much affection and love that Jaskier began to get a sense for just how much Eskel adored her. </span>
</p>
<p>
  <span>Eskel patted her one last time and stood. "Come on, then, let's head inside. I'll show you around the keep." Jaskier smiled and let Eskel pull him to his feet, even though it wasn't necessary. Lil' Bleater, he was unsurprised to see, followed them the entire way. </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>send prompts if you want <br/><a href="https://shyglittercreature.tumblr.com/">my tumblr</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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